A reader left a comment on my last post about letting go of everything eating disordered:
“Well, you still do drink diet coke, and you’re not even diabetic. Isn’t that still part of ED behav
oiior?”
Whoops. Busted! 
Yup, I still do drink diet soda, and I’ve never been secretive about that fact. Yeah, yeah, how could I, it’s so unhealthy, all that artificial sweeteners, blah blah blah.
First of all, let me make it clear that I have never said I’m totally recovered yet. Yes, I still have my vices. I still have things to work on. I still have instinctual thoughts and behaviors that are very much part of my eating disorder. I guess I didn’t make myself clear enough, but when I said to make a “complete turnover”, I realize that it is quite impossible to make that change all at once. I’m still in the progress of losing each smudge and traces of ED, but I have no doubt that one day, I will make it. I want to destroy every part of ED inside of me. Time will tell.
Taylor from Joy of Food wrote something with which I agreed:
“I think it can be hard to know for sure you’re recovered, until many many years later……So does that mean I’m not fully recovered? Who knows, all I know for sure is I’m happy, healthy and ED can get lost.
”
Tee hee hee! I love that mentality. In a way, recovery itself can be a major stress factor if we’re going to continue debating over whether this or that is truly ED or not, etc. We just have to keep in mind the ultimate goal: To be happy, to be healthy, and to tell ED to f**k off 
(I wish smileys had a middle-finger).
On that note, let me share my “excuse” for why I drink diet soda: I’ve always drunk diet coke, even way before my ED. Why? Because for some goddamn reason, I thought it was the “cool” thing to do.
Don’t laugh! When I first started drinking diet soda, I was 11, and it was a new thing in Singapore. I had no idea what “diet” or “light” meant. Calories meant nothing to me. In fact, I didn’t even know about calories until I moved to America. But a lot of the older women I admired drank diet soda. In the commercials, the sexy women drank diet soda. Thus, I thought diet soda must be the sexier version of regular soda. And I’ve been drinking diet soda ever since. Now, I’m just used to that taste of aspartame, and regular coke tastes weird to me.
Now that we’ve got that cleared up, let me share some frighteningly good news. I RECEIVED MY CABOT CHEESE! I won more than 4 lbs of cheese from Biz’s giveaway, and I had been impatiently waiting for it for more than a month! 
Oh, what a thing of beauty! Oh my Lord! Oh Lordie!
An assortment of cheddar and pepper jack cheeses: 
50% cheddar, 75% cheddar, and 50% pepper jack.
But the most exciting thing was this hunky baby: 
Extra sharp VINTAGE cheddar cheese…aged a minimum of 2 years!!! 
I can’t believe I received a whole brick of this amazing thing! I was ecstatic! I nibbled on it right away, and the taste was fan-freakin-tastic! 
I knew I had to come up with a recipe worthy of this lovely cheese. I turned to something else kind of vintage: 
Leftover carved turkey. Not from Thanksgiving (I already ate them all), but snitched from the dining hall (Shhhh…). Anyway, I hope this dish did the cheese justice:
Leftover Turkey Enchilada with Fruits and White Cheddar
Cook the garlic and red onion, then toss in the turkey dices, apple, and raisins. Pour in the almond milk and preserves, then spoon in some salsa, tasting as you go. Cook until the fruit is soft but not mushy. Then mix in the cottage cheese and with half of the cheddar cheese and chopped green onions. Spoon the filling into each tortilla and roll it up, making sure to leave some for topping. Assemble them into a baking dish. Top with leftover filling, and sprinkle with the rest of the cheddar cheese and green onions: The salsa I used was yet another sample from the Foodbuzz Festival: I’m sure you can substitute any other preserves or salsa you feel like, as long as it’s kind of fruity. For the cheese, I just used the good ol’ hand-grater to grate my precious vintage cheddar cheese: I still have some leftover turkey. I can’t wait to experiment more with it! Question of the day: What did you do with your leftover turkey? If you were me, what would you do with all that cheese?
Bake for about 20 minutes, or until the tortillas are crispy and the cheese on top is melted. Ta-da! 
This is the second time I’ve made “enchiladas”! Of course they’re not the traditional kind, but these are good, too! 
The pear, honey, and ginger preserves I used was from the swag bag from the Foodbuzz Festival, from a company called Quince & Apple: 
It was a tiny bottle. I was sad to see it all gone in one day. But it was freaking worth it! 
Big Orson’s Mango-Habarnaro Salsa. Hot. Sweet. I like! 
This dish was mildly sweet, but spicy and cheesy and tangy at the same time. It was perfect. Of course, I think everything I cook is perfect. 
But come on. This thing was perfection. 
Turkey tastes so much better with some kind of fruity sauce. And cheese, of course. 
I love how the tortilla gets all crunchy in the end: 
And the melted cheese all over: 
Fantastic. Perfectly filling, too. Please, if you’ve got any leftover turkey, make this dish. Your tummy will kiss you.
Related posts:
{ 95 comments… read them below or add one }
Next Comments →
Mmmm your turkey recipe looks great! And you sure do win a lot of stuff
Cheese soup? Lots of gourmet cheese sandwiches.
I think my Foodbuzz swag bag was missing half of the stuff. I keep seeing things on people’s blogs, and I didn’t have any of it. Still was a great time though
Look at all that cheese!! Mmm
Free Cheese!!!!!! Not fair!!!!! Man, oh man, I would love to have the problem of trying to get rid of all that cheese!!
I would have a wine and cheese party!!
Or, you could freeze some – apparently cheese freezes well. Or you could whip up some lasagnas and freeze those.
With leftover turkey, I would eat sandwiches!
Also, in case I haven’t told you lately – your pictures are the nicest ones on any blog I read!
For some reason, I seem to recall that there IS a middle-finger smiley out there…
<3<3
hahahah well that’s great you have one class! sorry about next semester…=(
i hope it is a wonderful wednesday!
so side note i just learned this year that turkey tastes good with cranberries, so i was a wee bit confused about the fruit-age in the enchiladas…then i remembered that turkey goes with fruit! so after all this thinking through: mmm those sound wonderful
i think you should make some good old grilled cheese with all that delicious cheese!!
Your cheese made me swoon.
I used to take food from the dining hall all the time…shh also
I made curry with my leftover turkey (that wasn’t used in open faced sandwiches)
You’re so lucky to have all that cheese to yourself! There’s nothing better than cheese and some cured meats late night before bed
White cheddar is my favorite kind of cheddar—I used to eat slices of that stuff plain! AGED white cheddar > everything else. You lucky girl!
Your enchilada sounds delish! And look at all that cheese, wow!
i make enchiladas with leftover turkey too. love ‘em!
you can make some sort of fab from scratch mac and cheese with that stuff… homemade is gooood.
So much cheese! I adore cheese!
My mom makes crepes filled with leftover chicken/turkey. She makes the stuffing with the meat, egg, parsley, cream and spices, stuffs the crepes and fries them. Delicious
need.. you..to come cook for me ASAP!! baha
all that cheese is lookin GOOD
love what you said in the first part of this post..so true girl
oh my cheese, is right!
haha. ive never been a cheese fan.. but when I did eat cheese, goat was my favorite.
roasted in the oven on fresh beets, with a leaf of basil. yum yum
I don’t really like the analogy of needing to be diabetic to drink diet soda. Lots and lots of people drink diet soda b/c it contains less sugar. Regardless, I still think *any* soda is pretty unhealthy, and don’t drink it – but that doesn’t make me have an eating disorder, or “restrictive.” Moving on…
Holy freaking cheese!!! I wouldn’t even know where to begin w/ that and I don’t blame you one little bit for breaking into that awesome vintage cheese first! I think you did it justice!
I did nothing w/ leftover turkey, we left it at J’s mom’s house w/ the other leftovers. Let’s just say there was a bit of a passive agressive battle of the wills going on that day and my feelings were seriously hurt and bruised, so that was my small snub – to not take leftovers. Immature, I know! If I HAD taken some, I would have made soup or turkey pot pie – my 2 favorite leftover dishes.
Hmm what to do w/ the cheese? I think I’d do what you did, and make a bunch of ooey gooey casserole, big mixed plates of goodies. Also, maybe something crunchy.
My absolute favorite cheese in the whole world is Vermont Cabot Sharp Cheddar. I’m from Vermont, so this stuff holds a place in my heart, even though I’m now vegan. As far as cheeses go, this stuff is some of the best. I used to love it straight up with Wheat Thins. The creaminess of the cheese pairs perfectly with the salty cracker. I’d also recommend pairing it with some apples on a grilled sandwich. Enjoy your bounty of cheese!
Mmmmm say CHEESE!! I’m jealous since I’ve been out of cheese forever and yet somehow always manage to forget and buy it at the store. I would make endless amounts of quesadillas and toasted bread with melted cheese because those are my faaaavorites.
And no worries about the diet soda thing. TONS of people drink diet soda, and they don’t have ED. It’s hard to say which is worse – bad stuff and chemicals + corn syrup & sugar. Or bad stuff and chemicals + more chemicals. Gotta pick your battles, and I choose to pick diet soda!
awesome post, awesome opening comments, great little food samples, wish i would have gone to the conference!
Love your style my friend!
those enchiladas look so fresh and yummy!
oh my i dunno what i’d do with that amount of cheese. i can’t eat too much of it b/c of my cholesterol so i’d probably freeze it. can you freeze cheese?!
Okay, for a while I thought the picture of the turkey was cheese and I was squinting at it trying to figure out HOW that was cheese…. then I read the caption. Oh! Turkey! Yes, makes sense now!
That food looks delish. Do you live in Whole Foods or something?
Do you just always have all of these ingredients on hand?
Turkey: in wraps, sandwiches with cranberry chutney…or honey mustard.
Cheese: in pasta, risotto, casseroles. Or just plain:)
(I’m the same with diet coke! Used to drink it a lot-also before ED- now a bit less, but still: so much better than regular coke;) )
okay now i know why my dad always drinks diet coke. he is trying to be cool i guess
Oh, for the f*ck of sh*t. What a jerk commenter. I just saw a commercial for Diet Coke with Tom Colicchio from Top Chef in it. I guess they better get him some help for his eating disorder!
I want that cheese.
I’m now craving aged cheese! What a great package to have received! Have a lovely day dear <3
Hey lovely girl.
You know I love me some cheese!!
I like Taylor’s mentality as well… not stressing out too much!!!
wait…. where did you get that salsa? I don’t have it!!!! how is that possible? were you hiring it from me and Maggie? hahahahha…..
I can’t think how to use that batch of cheese for one person!!! wooooo!!!! that’s just tooo much!!! but for a cheese lover.. probably not!
Your dishes always look amazing.. I don’t know how you do it! Although I tend to be more intrigued by your oriental ones (go figure
).
Keep drinking your diet soda babe
xox
Tat
If I had all that cheese…well I think I’ll send it to you, lol. We all know how you love this stuff!
I drink diet pepsi (not coca-cola/has to be pepsi) too, but it’s for taste aswell. I can even taste the difference between coca-cola and pepsi, so…But the diet 7up is god awful.
xoxo
I’m so jealous of your cheese. As for the diet soda, while it is an ED behavior, not everyone who drinks diet soda has an ED. No one should be drinking regular soda anyway (as an RD I make my clients stop that habit early on) so the diet soda thing is also very much an American custom since we seem to have a hard time doing soda in moderation. I am all for one regular soda on occasion, but some people really like caffienne and soda is the way they get it. I would rather people drink diet than regular if they insist on drinking soda at all (if that makes sense). So I think in general while it is an ED habit, it is also a habit of many people and doesn’t mean you can’t have a healthy lifestyle at a healthy weight just because you drink diet soda. Water has 0 calories too, and that’s something people with ED’s drink too, so does that mean you should not drink water?
Diet Coke tastes better I think. I don’t drink cola anymore but when I did I at least tricked myself into thinking that. It’s always something…i’ll never be fully recoverd.
Maybe you could have a mini giveaway with some of the cheese?
Thanks for the suggestion for grilling my banana bread. Genius! As is your recipe today
That is a ton of cheese!
I am trying to cut soda out. I don’t drink it very often, so ideally, it won’t be too hard!
OH MY such great photos! Thanks for posting them and enjoy the cheese!
~Wendy
Your comments on my blog are always so sweet
Regarding the first comment on YOUR blog, that you posted above, I don’t agree that drinking diet coke is a disordered eating behavior. I think it’s smart. Who wants to get a bunch of sugar from coke? It’s unhealthy, really.
The cheese, and your cheese creations, look fantastic! I would freeze it, can you do that? That way it won’t get moldy and you won’t feel forced to use it fast.
I’ve been using my leftovers in soup. SOOO good!
cheese, glorious cheese!!! i had my first leftover sammie last night, a nice hearty bread with dried cranberries and seeds, turkey, and slightly tart cranberry sauce
what i wait for every year!!
I try not to drink soda often but when I do, I always drink diet. And I am not dealing with diabetes or ED. I just think regular soda is too sweet and I am all set with that much sugar in one drink.
Your turkey enchiladas look great! no more leftovers here, unfortunately!
I’d be making a lot of lasagna and other cheesy pasta dishes. The Italian in me comes out when I see cheese
Cabots is totally my favorite! Majorly jealous over here! I’d probably be all over some Mexican food (enchiladas), and probably some cheesy empanadas, and definitely lasagna and gourmet grilled cheese!
ugh, that cheese looks AMAZING! and you can come make me those enchiladas any time
oh cheese, how I love thee! when are you coming back to NYC?
Envious over all that cheese. Especially the aged cheddar. mmm
I would make cheese frittatta quiche=y thing in the oven . You could even use the leftover turkey if you wanted to .
Mac and cheese healthified would be awesome with the sharper/aged cheese too.
Or you could combine the mac and cheese recipe with the turkey, add veg , top with shredded cheese in a skillet and voila.
Oh my cheese!! thats insaneee I love cabot, the cheeses are so creamy and delicious! the factory in VT is so fun, samples galore
with all that cheese I owuld be making some serious quesadillas, sprinkle it on soups, make grilled cheese! you could also make fondue
So excited to see every brilliant recipe you come up with using all of that beautiful cheese.
I know tons of people who drink diet coke…. Anyways.
Boy, that CHEESE… You could make some sweet potato burritos
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Addictive-Sweet-Potato-Burritos/Detail.aspx
And make one of these delicious cheeses part of it!
(I put salsa on top of these burritos btw, it adds a lot of flavor!)
I drink diet soda…. I love diet soda!
I probably drink one a day, maybe less…
who cares! as long as you’re not drinking it like water…..
what an awesome contest to win! I love your combination of fruits in your enchiladas. I love the sweet and spicy combination and all the ingredients that you used sounds like it would be amazingly delicious together. I cant wait to try it.
Also congrats on your hard work and dedication so far to overcoming your ED. Its not an easy thing to do. So way to go girl!! Keep on rocking=) Your doing great!
Holy cow – that’s a lot of cheese – you look like you have a life time’s supply of calcium right there. Are you sure you’re not from Minnesota? =)
I am a big cheese eater!!! HIA HIA HIA
that VINTAGE cheddar cheese looks really c0oooool. The first time I see a black cover!
so , now, how are you gonna use all of these cheese? looking forward to see your cheesy postings in the following days, hahahah
You can never go wrong with mac and cheese, right? Plus I know you would find a way to up the creative ante on baked pasta! (yes, I consider mac and cheese baked pasta, when my mom made it homemade that’s how she always did it!)
Interesting reflections on ED. I feel the same way about DE (disordered eating). I know there will be a day that I will listen to what my body wants and respect that. As for now, what can I say, I’m working on it!
Next Comments →
{ 2 trackbacks }