If my day could be summed up into one sentence yesterday, it would be that “I felt like shit.”
I will not go into much details, but basically, an article that I slaved over for was not printed. My editors decided to leave it out at the last minute without even warning me beforehand. The next morning I got a nasty surprise when I saw my story missing from the paper. I emailed my editors asking why it was missing, and they blamed it on space issues and the fact that the Safety Awareness Fair I was covering just wasn’t so “newsworthy” after all because it wasn’t any different from last year’s fair.
You can tell I’m seriously upset when my expressions turn stoic. Usually I like to throw a tantrum, putting all my frown muscles into work, with expletives ejecting out of my mouth, but when I am truly, deeply upset, I go silent and blank-faced and pale like a zombie.
That may have been my exterior appearance, but my interior state was a boiling turmoil. It wasn’t just the fact that I felt like a failed journalist. It was also the fact that I wasted so much time 1) sitting around waiting and missing a class for a call from an interviewee who was more than 4 hours late, 2) missing a social event so I that I got home in time for an interviewee who promised to call but didn’t, and 3) almost getting a police officer upset because my editor wanted me to grill him further about why he couldn’t prevent all the crimes that happened within our campus.
Yesterday I felt like all my inner joy and peace had been sucked out of me. I felt dry and enervated. I even skipped a class because I just didn’t want to do anything. I just sat at my desk and stared into nothingness, with a flurry of thoughts and worries whirling in my head.
Isn’t it scary how your peace can be swooped away in a flash? I can be happy and thankful one moment, and then something small happens and all that positive emotions and thoughts are zapped into a crisp. All that’s left is toxic ashes that continue to poison my mind and emotions.
And then I realized—Holy cow. When was the last time I read my bible? When was the last time I had a real, deep, personal one-to-one with God? No wonder my emotions are a flitter-flutter these days. I’ve lost touch with my foundation, my source of life, my never-changing and everlasting companion!
Suddenly I had this tugging urge to flip open the bible. And what would you know? God’s hands flipped open the pages for me to this verse:
“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?…Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” –> Matthew 6:26, 34
I bolded every single word in that verse because every. single. word. pierced deep into my heart and soul. Holy shit. How could I have forgotten just how powerful God’s word is? I’ve been putting a lot of stuff as first priority before my own state of mind and spirit. I’ve been like a bobbing jellyfish, letting myself be led by the waves around me instead of being deeply rooted within my base and foundation. No wonder I’ve been all over the place!
Sorry, this has become rather long, but I’ve been hit by such a flash of inspiration that I just had to let it all out. I’ve made a resolution:
- I am not going to let anything tear me away from my base of foundation, which is key to strengthening my inner peace and joy. To me that’s God, and the bible.
- I will live each day for each day only, as the bible verse suggested. Yesterday was shitty, but today— Today, I start again, afresh.
In fact, I’m already plenty excited for today’s event. I’ll be meeting up with Mimi for lunch, and then we might be going to a screening this evening for the ABC Family TV show GREEK. And yes, I’ll be covering it for the Daily Trojan and perhaps even scoring an interview with the cast members. We’ll see how that goes. 
And can I just say how blessed I am to have met Mimi? She seriously is a wonderful, sweet, amazing, intelligent person. In fact she was the first person I wailed to about my unprinted article (which is probably in the trash right now). We’re from totally different backgrounds, but we are alike in many ways. One of which is our passion for good food.
Indeed, we even braved the lousy LA metro bus system to get a taste of LA’s famous Umami Burger. Yes, we rode an hour’s worth of horrible public transportation just to get a damn burger. And holy cow, it was freaking worth it. 
Umami Burger has not been around for long, but it’s already created quite a sensation. So popular, in fact, that it’s got plans to open up in two more locations. It was way past 2 when Mimi and I arrived, but it was still pretty crowded! 
According to this website, Umami is a Japanese term referring to “a pleasant savoury taste imparted by glutamate, a type of amino acid, and ribonucleotides, including inosinate and guanylate, which occur naturally in many foods including meat, fish, vegetables and dairy products.”
Huh? Let me simplify it for you: Umami is the freaking amazing 5th sense of taste that makes you salivate like crazy when you chomp on a good savory dish. Think: MSG. Ahhh.
And that’s exactly the sensation we got when we chomped into our burger. 
We ordered two burgers and split them both to share. One was the original Umami burger: 
Meaty beef burger, roasted tomato, mushroom, Parmesan chip, caramelized onion, and spread on a toasted Portuguese bun. Umami…x6!!! 
The other was the Turkey Miso Burger: 
Turkey burger with Asian BBQ sauce and avocado relish on Portuguese bun.
Holy Freaking Sensation! Words cannot describe how amazing these burgers were. Literally, my mouth was watering as it chewed on this burger. I was wondering how the burger cold be so freaking juicy, and it turns out half the juice was from my own saliva! 
Now that’s what I’m talking about! 
And that Parmesan chip…pretty damn cool!
The service wasn’t that great, though. It was mad-busy and the waiters were all over the place. 
But that was okay, because I wasn’t there for the service, but for the food. And they wore really nice Umami shirts, so they are excused (I want that shirt!)
Suffice to say, I will definitely be visiting again. My heart already aches to return and try the other burgers. Check out the menu: 
Oh, and side-note: What is with the annoying little plants that restaurants love to place in the middle of the table? 
This irritating little tree is just getting in the way of me and my food!
AH! I can’t stand it any longer. I have to stop thinking about Umami. Until I return again, I shall refrain from all thought Umami. Homer goes “Mmm…Donuts…” and I go “Mmm…Umami…”. Okay, seriously Sophia, stop.
Bye bye!
Question of the day: What keeps your thoughts and emotions grounded each day? And what is the best burger you’ve had?
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Great post!! I love burgers, and my favorite is the Thurman burger (from the famous Columbus, Ohio Thurman’s Deli!). It’s HUGE and so good. Of course, a umami burger sounds fantastic. I wonder how they get that “umami” taste in there. Your pictures made my stomach growl
Regarding your request for information about amenorrhea, there really is not much out there. If you don’t get a period, I’m sure you know why, and I’d assume you will be getting one as soon as you reach a decent weight. IF you don’t, obviously see a doctor because other things could be going on, but most likely it’s the ED. As far as long-term effects of the condition:
Long-term amenorrhea and estrogen-deficiency may raise a woman’s risk of excess bone loss and osteoporosis. This makes bones more likely to break.
This is the only side effect I found. OF course it’s a bad one, but I’m sure you already knew about it. Keep eating your dairy products and be sure to get a calcium supplement!! Also, get sun when you can, that’s the best way and in California that’s not too hard!
oh.. no! your editor is so unconsiderate! But that’s life girl… isn’t easy for anyone and we need to accept that. I know how it feels when suddenly everything seems at the wrong place and all our effort seem useless… i’ve had many days like this. but so glad to know that you found the bible verse inspiring and flip the bad mood and had an amazing burger!
What keeps me gronded? definitely my loved ones!
that verse is fantastic.
and i love this prayer when life’s up in the air, a good “God, I am doing my best and I’m going to trust it’ll work out”:
My Lord God
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think I am following
your will does not mean
that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that my desire to please you
does in fact please you.
And I hope that I have that desire
in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything
apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this
you will lead me by the right road
though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always
though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear,
for you are ever with me,
and you will never leave me
to face my perils alone.
- Thomas Merton (1915-1968)
I could so go for one of those burgers right now!
Great post! And the last place I had a great burger was at The Thinking Man’s Tavern in Decatur. My mouth is drooling….
You are an old soul girl! You are just about enough to make this atheist reconsider! I love reading about your relationship with God, it inspires me to think about it. p.s. that burger looks really yummy!
Nice post…and the burger looks so yummie!
What a good question! Hmm… I love my dad’s turkey burgers. A good burger must always have a Kraft single, a big slice of fresh tomato, and some crispy lettuce. And mayo!
So sorry your editor’s did that to you. It sounds like you are looking on the bright side of things though!
I don’t eat meat anymore, but those burgers looked darn good. The best burger I ever had was the Tokyo Burger at Met Bar and Grill: http://www.metbarandgrill.com/burgers/international
Gosh I can imagine that was a huge disappointment after going to all that effort. I really love to read about your relationship with God, its wonderful your able to turn to Him when you need to get grounded, sometimes I feel as though Im missing something in my life and I really feel thats it, a proper relationship with God.
That verse was great, Im going to keep that one in my head it just applies to everyday life so well
Yours burgers just look amazing, you dont burgers like that here! I think the best burger I ever had was one in a cafe in England, it had lots of bacon, cheese, onions and the burger bit to, then they covered it in some type of sauce that tasted kind of barbecue style I think, ohhh it was so good.
Hope the rest of your week picks up for you,xoxo
I thought after reading the title: this must be good…And those burgers look GOOD!!! I just want a bite through my computer screen.
I’m so proud of you! Why? Because you were having a bad time (and you know what, that’s normal. Sometimes life sucks, things happen) and you turned it into something so powerful and positive! Wow! That’s amazing:) You learn from everything, remember?
I had a great burger with hummus and grilled vegetables, I think that’s one of my favorites.
Stay strong Sophia, you’re doing amazing! xxx Julia (Taste of Living)
I am sorry you had a tough day but Kudos on getting yourself out of the funk and moving on.
This might sound corney but lately I have been craving to read the bible…I am not the most religious person; I think of myself of being more spiritual but I just have this yearning to read it…it started when my grandmother passed away last year.
BTW those freaking burgers look divine!
Stuff happens, whether it’s fortunate or not so much. Don’t let it bother you. It’s just like patients who come into the pharmacy and don’t appreciate you for the work you do. Just expect it to happen sometimes.
Best burger I’ve had (so far) was at the Vortex in downtown Atlanta.
Oh Sophia. I don’t know where to begin. I don’t know if you were reading my blog a few months ago when I was asked to write an article? Shirt story, guy said he loved it and it would be up on the website ASAP. Several months later, it’s still now up. Journalism is TOUGH. Particularly the training… My brother was told in his lectures to make sure he was FIRST on the scene of a tragedy to talk to the family. Then on leaving, to make some rude and insensitive comments so that the family wouldn’t want any more contact with journalists, so he would have the story as his own. Harsh and sickening. He never did it. He isn’t a religious person, but he has morals and principles and stands by them- even though it has meant he hasn’t been snapped up by a news channel or magazine. He also has a thick skin…don’t take it personally. As hard as it is, newspapers want to sell the papers. They really don’t care about much else. Ditto a LOT of industries- it all does come down to money and selling/buying. Keep going. Whatever you and whatever it takes. It’s a few years and then you can carve your own niche as a journalist…whether that is travelling and interviewing people who have changed their lives after finding God, or working for a big-shot gourmet food magazine. There is a place for you in the reporting world and you will find it.
I needed to see that verse today
What keeps me grounded? Hot coffee, reading sweet comments on my blog…heck, reading blogs calms me down and makes me feel a part of a ‘family’
Yay UMAMI! I knew what that was- I watch “QI”! Hehe. I would be going for that manly burger for sure! Best burger I ever had: turkey burger with cranberry chutney and shaved brussel sprouts on brioche bun with sweet potato fries. Bomb dot com.
Sorry about the aritcle I know how you feel!
Love the eats and glad you are adjusting to school life.
That’s one of my mom’s favorite verses. She used to tell it to me and my brother when we were going through tough times – that just as God has taken care of the little bird, he’ll take care of you too!
Sorry about the article! I’m sorry you had to waste so much time for it! That stinks, but at least you’re taking the high road.
I’m not a big burger person b/c most seem so bland and boring to me but those look SO creative and delicious!!! I love all of the flavors and how they’re a nice medium rare!
When life throws you crappy editors, go eat a burger!
That was really mean of your editors, I hope they realize that they should never have done that! I think you are such a talented writer. I remember having to memorize that Bible verse for Sunday School and I won a bookmark haha
Ohhh, I’m SO sorry! SOooo frustrating! As always, though, I am awed and inspired by your ability to turn a difficult situation into an uplifting experience… The verse you turned to is incredible – it’s amazing how God always leads us to the solution in our times of need…
Praying for strength and insight is always where I turn when I need to stay grounded during difficult times…
As for burgers… Oh my goodness, those Umami burgers look a-m-a-z-i-n-g!!! The best burger I’ve ever had was definitely a mushroom, Swiss cheese, and avocado turkey burger – I’ll never forget the taste!
Sophia, do not get down on yourself! Do you know, I didn’t even have the nerve to write for my school newspaper until I was in second year? And here you are doing it in your first weeks!! That is amazing, and shows your passion and dedication. Two things that cannot be ruined by picky editors. You are doing a fantastic job!!
I’m drooling over that burger too! The best burger I ever had was one my mom made two months ago. It was my first hamburger in over 10 years. It changed my life.
Sorry about your dissapointment, I can definitely relate. But I’m glad you were able to reconnect to your roots and come through it ok
sorry about your article; you had every right to be upset
Glad you were able to find what you needed in God/Bible!
Those burgers – amazing!
Awww sweetie I’m sorry about your article. You worked so hard, I’m sure. But you have the right attitude – I’m sure you learned a lot from the research and hard work, and also learned a lot form it not getting printed. Next time!
I may have to convince my family to find that place next time we’re in LA! That turkey burger – mmmm!!!!!
Hey Kiddo,
Sorry to always sound like a mom when I comment on writing, but just know it was most certainly not a reflection on your work! Every single month I write more than ever gets used, as our copy depends on the advertisers and space. So, a 1,300 word feature might get cut down to 800 words. All that work for nothing!
Just this week I did a freelance feature that ended up at 1,800 words. What did she use? 800. It tears your heart out, but that’s just how things go…at least you’re sharpening your skills and learning from the process?
Hang in there and use it as motivation and determination. Keep your studies first and foremost-profs won’t “cut” requirements at the last minute–and let the publishings follow. You’re so bright and talented, that they’re sure to follow!
That is one of my favorite Bible verses. I agree worrying and regret do nothing!
Sorry you had a crappy day. It happens to all of us.
Though I am not religious, glad to hear you found a way to feel more rooted!
I once had a bomb taro root burger in Maui…sooo good!
Just remember everyone has to go through things like this to appreciate the good days. God will give you strength to come away from this experience stronger.
I think I still have yet to have a burger that has rocked my world…
i love umami! christy and i have been there numerous times b/c our friend cedar works there (doesn’t look like he was your waiter, or else we’d have to slap him!)
wow what a gorgeous burger!!!!!!!!!!!!
wowza those burgers do look mighty fine! Nothin beats a big juicy burger mmm.
Just knowing that I have family who will always be there for me keeps me grounded.
I loveeeeee big burgers with a giant fried onion ring in it and loaded with everything else. lol .. seriously though.. so good.
I LOVE that verse… that one, lots of prayer, and my fam keep me grounded for sure!
Now, the best burger I’ve had is just regular old 5 Guys but I think I need to move to LA.
I’m glad you found your center again! It is so true that we worry about so many things, and let external things upset us when they shouldn’t. You’re too amazing a woman to let a stuffy old editor upset you.
That burger joint looks amazing. Try burgers from The Counter…. you can customize to your own liking!! So many choices.
I don’t eat many burgers, but Red Robin has a mighty good veggie burger with all sorts of sauces and toppings. I stay grounded each day, and especially in horrible work days like I have had recently, by remembering that at the end of the day I get to go home to my husband, or call my mom or sister. Thinking of my real life ie those people who love me no matter what makes the hard times easier!
Sorry about your article. But that’s gonna happen every now and then. I gotta try Umami one of these days.
Hmmm…how to I stay grounded everyday? That’s a good one. I try not to let the things around me affect my attitude too much. Things will happen hen they do and all I can do is just let them be and try to work around it. There’s a reason why they happen. I’m pretty mellow and easy going in general.
As for the best burger…I can’t really recall the best burger. I guess I haven’t eaten too many burgers to really know.
I love how you opened this post..you are soooooooooo funny. Thats how I cope with stress..I find things to laugh at. Figtreeapps
Woah, that burger looks AMAZING!! I’m actually going to be doing an “umami chicken roast” this week-end, so we’ll see how it goes!
It really sucks about your article… I can understand your frustration. But good job on getting past it, it shows how STRONG you are
Lovely!! U know i luv ‘em burger or anything with bread hehe…
Again its great reading yr post, I clicked on yr link today without knowing wht to expect but only knowing tht whatever it is, ur post will surely cheer me up somewhat.
True enough, it did.
I was diagnosed with pneumonia yest, after a week of fever and cough.
Meds alone cost me RM600! Doc wanted to admit me at 1st but changed his mind as he said it is not H1N1 and also cos pneumonia is bacteria related and hence its better to recover at home.
Sigh.. a job that hardly pays enough monthly and a a whopping med bill!
Life totally sucks..
But yeahh.. like u said..maybe i should just live each day as it comes..and let tmw be.. for i sure as hell don’t feel that’s much hope anymore..
Ughhh that is so frustrating!!! It takes me a loooong time and a lot of heart and soul to write something…if that happened to me I really don’t know what I would do. It’s a good thing you’ve got your faith to pull you through!
Perspective. That’s what God’s word is all about. And it’s hard to get perspective when our emotions are high. I know, I felt the same way today. Infuriated. and Embaressed. Seriously, I don’t know what I would do without His perspective. I’d probably have way more anxiety than I could possibley deal with.
what a unique restraunt!!
the best burger I had was from a place called The Grotto. It had walnut, zuccini, and mushrooms.
amazing.
my family. and my passion for arts keep me grounded.
I’m sorry about your bad day. That sort of thing can really get under your skin, but you seem to have just the right perspective and source of inspiration.
The burgers both look so amazing! I had a burger from Ray’s Hell Burger a few weeks ago, and it was pretty awesome. I can see why the prez went there. Having said that… my favorite is probably still Five Guys. Too bad there isn’t an Umami around here! I like a little burger competition!
That is an amazing verse, Sophia, and it totally applies to my life right now too!
LOL at the burger being juicy because of your saliva! Man, that really must have been some burger!
These days, God keeps me grounded
I know that my temper and OCD-ness has gotten so much better since my relationship with God has gotten stronger (and my family agrees XP)
The best burger I had was the chicken burger my mom ordered (I posted about it) the chicken was perfectly charred and grilled and it had that amazing smoky flavor. I’m not even a big fan of chicken breast since it can be dry, but this was juicy and so very tasty. It also had smoked cheddar cheese and avocado salsa. Alongside it were these amazing fries! This was my mom’s dish, but I ate half of it, haha!
What keeps me grounded: Knowing that I did the best I could and anything beyond that is out of my control.
The best burger I’ve EVER had: My husband’s pepper jack stuffed burger topped with caramelized onions and homemade green tomato relish. YUM!
Great read! I’m the same way when it comes to anger. Trust me, I hold back a lot on my blog, even going as far as to change the spelling of curse words as not to offend some, but in real life, watch out! LOL I usually end up crying at some point – and then calm down. Tears are salty relievers!
That said, glad you were able chill and post those mouth watering burger photos . Never been to Umami Burger, but the varieties and photos look amazing! I’m not sure there’s even one around here (NYC area).
Finally, the awards were definitely flattering, considering I never get any, seriously. That was a week of surprises!
Know exactly how you feel. Had something similar happen to me today with a staff training program I put on. As a former journalism major and a former newspaper journalist…this stuff happens all the time in real world. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad writer or a bad journalist AT ALL! So, Keep writing!
I love anykind of burger with tomato and avocado on it, yum!
Praying, church and reading Bible keep me going each day, sometimes I get like that too and need to take a step back and just let go!
Sometimes, food just makes it better. I’m pretty sure those burgers would have made my day too.
take it as a learning experience and a challenge to your inner peace, perhaps it’s a norm in the real professional journalist’s life?
glad you feel better though! (: i’m sure you’ll have more articles to come!
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